Our history as we know it - Child 1 Things Get Worse

At this point my wife was also starting to desire to have our first child.  As luck or the grace of God would have it we did end up finding a gyno that sent my wife to bio-feedback physical therapy.  This combined with fertility treatment allowed us to conceive our first child.  During pregnancy my wife’s pain levels would go up and down, it was really hit or miss.  Sometimes penetration was great, other times oral or manual stimulation worked well.

After our child was born was the worst time ever.  My wife was on progesterone only BC pills, followed by the ring (I don’t remember it’s medical name, but a flexible round ring about the size of a bracelet that is inserted into the vagina and left in there for the month.)   For the next 2.5 years if I even looked in her direction she would scream in pain.  About once or twice a month she would send some affection my way, but even doing something to me would cause her pain as whenever she was aroused she would hurt.

So we then reached a “what now” point.  She wanted a second child, penetration was out of the question, and there wasn’t a gyno around (we moved a lot so we were jumping state to state as this was all going on.) that had any ideas.  While doing some research on the internet we found a Botox study for pelvic pain.  She went through 3 rounds of shots and that loosened her up enough that we were able to have intercourse.  Not fun intercourse, but very clinical, enough that combined with fertility treatment allowed us to get pregnant with our second child.

After the birth of our second child things were a little better, and by a little better I mean better than the low point we were at for the previous 3 years.  We were able to have sex about once every two weeks, if she was on top and I didn’t move much.  So far from ideal, but when dealing with this type of issue you do what you can and are happy for every little bit.  At this point we were both at a psychological low, my wife wanted to quite the Dr search, she felt that no one knew what was wrong and that she was just broken and that is how it was going to be for the rest of her life.  That and financially it isn’t an easy thing to bare either.   Discussions like this isn’t fair to you, you should find a girlfriend on the side and we can just be roommates and raise the kids, and talks like that took place.  I was persistent and faithful, and made her push on with the Dr search, or I should say together we continued the search.